How to dominate with humiliation

In the right context, doing your hair can be deeply sexy. That context is, of course, if you’ve got him naked in a spreader bar, bending over to touch his ankles, and holding hair grips in his mouth with the express instruction not to drop any of them. I get Bookpal a bit bored of this after a while, but occasionally shouting at him to stay in position can be both amusing and erotic, especially if it makes him hard.

Making him take off his pants in public places. I’ve read this trick in countless male dom/female sub erotica – she is ordered to go to the toilet and remove her pants because – inevitably – she’s wearing a skirt and he can have fun touching her up under the table. What isn’t so frequently explained, though, is that you can order a guy to do exactly the same thing, with very similar effect. Bonus points if you can get him to undo his flies under the table while you’re having dinner.

There are humiliation games for guys that involve wearing my knickers too. Although an ex of mine and I used to chat frequently about the genderpolitics of sissyfication, and why we were both Guardian-readingly uncomfortable with the idea that guys wearing knickers was seen as a submissive/weak/humiliating thing, for some reason that didn’t stop it being intensely hot. Hot for him, because the feel of the knickers is sensual and filthy, and hot for me because oh holy shit I love the look of an erection in a tight pair of lacy panties.

How to dominate during sex

There is nothing – repeat: nothing – that makes me feel more dominant than ordering a guy to fuck me with a strapon. It’s obviously not as orgasmic as regular sex with his cock, but my God it makes him feel weak and small and horny and desperate, as his own solid erection is squashed against the inside of the harness, and I’m gasping and panting and enjoying something he cannot even feel.

Belts are useful for a number of different things, not always including doubling them over and beating fuck out of someone. One of my favourite dominant fucks happens in the missionary position – generally one in which people assume

the gentleman is in control or holding the rythmn. But if he’s wearing a buttplug, and I’ve looped a belt between his legs so I can tug on both ends to make him go faster/harder/deeper? Then he does exactly what I want, exactly when I want it. As an additional bonus, the buttplug made it much easier for him to come, so he had the mental panic of having to try and stave off his ejaculation – the more I tugged the harder he wanted it, and the harder he wanted it, the harder it was to hold it off, so he had to slow down, so I tugged harder, thus creating a vicious circle of angry hot fucking.

Similarly, fucking him on a chair while he’s wearing a buttplug. But you know that already, right?